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Have you observed the cost you incur when negotiating with difficult people? Negotiating with such people can be weird from several perspectives.

First, there’s the mental anguish of interacting with them. Next, there’s the physical anxiety that manifest itself in the form of stress. Then, there’s the ‘time wasted’ factor due to the mental agility they subject you to.

Depending on the relationship you have with such people, if you deal with them efficiently you can expedite the negotiation process and get back to normalcy.

The following is a simplistic formula for negotiating with difficult people.

Determine the value of the difficult person:

• Some people are difficult to negotiate with because of the way they see themselves. They have the mindset of someone that wants to be catered to because of their perceived status, or for whatever reason they deem the need to elevate themselves. With this mindset, they may take a, ‘I win/you lose’ approach to the negotiation. When dealing with such a person, acknowledge the perceived self-status they possess. Only do so to the degree that you don’t put yourself in a compromising position that’s difficult to recover from. Part of your assessment lies in determining the value they have of you, your organization, etc. Once you make your determination, move to the next step.

Assess what to do to/with them:

• After you’ve determined their value, create several options that might be feasible to alter the negotiation’s path. This can be from kowtowing to being extremely rude (i.e. sometimes standing up to such a person is all that’s needed to bring them back in line). Depending on the thoughts you’ve generated to address the situation, the solution will lay somewhere between the boundaries. I’d suggest you not implement your softest or harshest option, because that would not leave you room to move past that point in either direction. Plus, you want to give nonverbal signals as to the negotiation direction which you’re prepared to move, based on the response the difficult person displays (i.e. if they begin to move in the ‘right’ direction, you can be nicer). Keep in mind that you can reflect their behavior, too. Some difficult people may not realize the behavior they’re displaying until they see it mirrored back. Once they sense it from you, they may soften their demeanor.

Get difficult people out of your environment/life:

• Once you have them under control, seek to reach the end of the negotiation as quickly as possible. Get them out of your environment. One reason you want to expedite them is due to the fact that in a negotiation some difficult people will use a harsh demeanor as a way to test your pressure points to see how you’ll react to their omnipotence. Then, they’ll soften their position, only to apply that negative demeanor at another time. In essence, they’ll be playing a version of ‘good cop, bad cop’ with themselves in both roles. You won’t know if it’s Jekyll or Hyde that you’re dealing with until they display their real demeanor, which may only be that demeanor for the time it takes them to shift characters again.

While you may have to make several attempts to bring a difficult person in line, once you effectively deal with them, you’ll feel better at the outcome of the negotiation… and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

Yesterday I had the singular displeasure of sitting through a particularly bad presentation, so bad that I had to write this article as a form of catharsis (see: Aristotle). Without further ado, here are my Top 3 Presenting Don’ts:

Reading off a slide or other presentation materials – This might be my biggest pet peeve: When someone just stands there and reads directly off of what they are presenting. PowerPoint presentations are where you see this the most, as the offender in question will just sit there and read their slides word for word. What good does this do me? I could easily read the presentation on my own time and get the same thing out of it. The same goes true for just reading paragraphs from your notes. Even if you are giving a speech, you should be using notes. Bottom line: Don’t use your materials as a crutch, use them as a tool.

Um…yeah…Um – Another problem I have is when the presenter is not a good public speaker. This may sound harsh, but it really grates on my nerves when every other word out of the presenter’s mouth is “Um”. The biggest problem with this is that the flow of the presentation is interrupted every time one of these words slips out. If the flow of the presentation is constantly disturbed, the audience is going to get less out of the presentation. Another problem (at least in my eyes) is that these words make the presenter sound less professional and sure of themselves. It’s much easier to get your point across if you are seen as an expert rather than the intern.

Looking at your feet – Last but not least, I hate it when a presenter constantly looks anywhere else besides their audience. This is awful practice and serves to keep the audience distant from the presentation as opposed to deep into the content. Eye contact really draws people in and makes them pay attention. If you don’t maintain eye contact, you’ve probably lost half your audience right off the bat.

These are three of the biggest problems I see at many of the presentations I attend. I’d be interested in finding out what others think of the problems I’ve stated above, and any other problems you’ve experienced.

You’re ready!

You’ve got an idea you’re excited about and can’t wait to start implementing it.

You mapped out your schedule and put together all the necessary information for the plan to go with your idea.

You’d love to give it just one last once over, though – maybe a “presentation checklist” if you will.

This week I’ve put together for you a list of things that could help you feel even more confident (and in turn, more excited!) going into your sponsorship presentation.

That’s where I come in: to share the 5 elements that you’ll need to give a winning sponsorship presentation!

1. Make sure your idea is finished

If you’re not sure about some aspects of the project, it’s better to figure it out beforehand. The clearer your own project is in your head, the more confident you’ll be in answering any questions.

QUICK TIP: If you’re still feeling unclear about your idea, do more research or ask colleagues, family members or friends for clarification; a second opinion to make sure your idea is clear will help!

2. Find common ground with the prospect.

Everyone likes attention and nobody wants to feel like a faceless ATM. Do your research and get to know your prospect. Tailor your offer to their values and beliefs! It doesn’t mean you need to lose your individuality, of course.

The trick is to find a sponsor who shares your own views and beliefs. It will make sponsorship natural and logical. You don’t ask a tobacco company to sponsor an event for children. Give them a reason to work with you! After all, what’s better than a similar mission?

QUICK TIP: Make a list of your prospect’s values and interests and cross reference them with your own to feel confident in your common ground!

3. Promise less, do more

Don’t oversell yourself. Even if you do a good job, your sponsor might be disappointed simply because he was promised more. Try to give yourself some cushion to exceed expectations. If you do what you promised – good. If you do even more because you had the room to maneuver – even better!

QUICK TIP: Google other sponsorship proposals for your area of expertise and see what they’ve offered. This can help you to bring up new ideas so you can offer “a little extra”!

4. Simplify

When I plan a presentation, I always want to seem confident. I’m tempted to “facilitate the interface” instead of just “simplifying” it, or to “give assistance to the remainder of the users” instead of “helping the rest of them.” You get the picture?

It’s easy to get lost in the corporate lingo. The truth is, no normal person speaks it fluently. Drop the big words like ‘implement’ and ‘execute’, and you’ll see how strong and solid your speech is without all the clutter.

QUICK TIP: To make sure you’re making perfect sense, try giving your presentation to some friends – someone who knows little to nothing about the project. You don’t need to impress them, so just explain what you do and why and how. Do they understand you? Are they able to retell it correctly in their own words? If the answer is yes to both, then great job, you’re ready! If not, simplify a bit more and try again. You’ll get it right, for sure!

5. Illustrate.

A great final touch is to paint a broad strokes picture in your prospect’s mind. Use photos, schemes, or promo videos of your project. Give numbers: people attending, estimated quantities, places, and names. All these details will magically transform any abstract idea into the real deal.

To add to that, make sure you have ways for the public to learn about you and to see you make progress. If it’s an event, upload some behind-the-scenes photos. If it’s a product, show the process of how it’s being developed.

QUICK TIP: Use Twitter, Facebook, YouTube – anything that fits you! We live in a world where if you don’t exist in the internet, you don’t exist at all, and visible progress helps paint a clearer picture of your idea.

All that’s pretty useful. But the most important, gravely serious, undeniably vital thing is: Be yourself. Know yourself and your project. The presentation will almost give itself if you go with your gut.

You can get sponsored!

It may take time and there might even be a few “no’s” along the way no matter how awesome your presentation is and how well you’ve done your research. I’ve been doing this for years, and I still hear “no” from time to time.

What matters is finding the right people to see your idea for the amazing opportunity it is.

Keep going, you’ve got this!