People often buy Jade gifts to express their feelings. Because it is not only material goods, but also is the spirit of the product. Since ancient times, the Jade has the meaning of energy, health, wealth and long life. All the more, it is a symbol of the stable love between husband and wife. More and more young person use the Jade as gifts to express good wishes and hope

Let us tell two stories about presenting Jade gifts. Mr. John is a manager of a big company. with the birthday of his father coming, he got worrying. That is because he did not how to choose a gift for his father. Since he got married last year, he and his wife moved out to live in a new house. As he is very busy in company, and had less holidays to visit his parents. Even sometimes, he must travel in foreign countries for business. Occasionally, he read a essay of a magazine, and got some suggestions about gifts. Jade gift is a good way to present gifts. At the birthday of his father, Mr. John showed a Jade gift to all guests. Everyone was attracted by it. The Jade gift just expressed the love of Mr. John to his parents. They smiled happily.

Another story happened in the bridal couple. Because of different personality, Mr. Mike often argued with his wife in daily life after wedding. When he come back home, the air was tense. In order to get a harmony of family, Mr. Mike always wanted to buy a gift for his wife. So that he can apologize for his impolite words. One day, when he went to shopping in a downtown. He saw a petty Jade ornament between a lot of gifts. He picked it up at once. At a romantic supper with candles. Mr. Mike presented the Jade gift to his wife, and then said some warm words. From that time, they seldom argue with each other.

From two stories above, we can learn that maybe it is right to choose a Jade gift. Every good Jade gift is carved out by hand, it stands for a meaning of real love.

It is fairly common to avoid what we experience, specifically if we don’t like what the experience brings with it. Often, dare I say always, it is the emotional component that is disliked, unaccepted or denied.

I don’t like anger

I am aware of this right now. Today marks what would have been my mother’s 70th birthday, if she had not chosen to end her life prematurely in January this year. Today is a heavy day for me and I struggle with the mixture of anger at her decision to leave, her not being physically present and celebrating with her and her one year old grandchild, the feeling of missing her and on the other side the desire for me to be compassionate, accepting and seeing the positive in everything. Right now, the anger is much more prevalent and in my head I hear the screaming voice saying: ‘What the hell is there positive in this???’

I just want to feel better

I’m reminded of one of my client’s session this week where my client said: ‘I want to feel better, I don’t like feeling the way I’m feeling and it doesn’t make sense anyway.’

As a starting point, the desire to change isn’t wrong. It might just be premature to want to change from anger to joy in one step. There is a good reason for the emotion in the moment, whether we like it or not. There must be, otherwise why were we as a human emotional being constructed this way? Beside the obvious, the release of the various emotional responses help us deal with what is and release tension. Tears help you heal. So do the emotions that are present, with or without tears.

Charge versus memory

If you look back along the timeline of your life you will notice that there are memories that have little or no emotional charge. These are the events that you have dealt with and emotionally released. No matter how far back in time, those which still hold some negative emotional charge have not been fully released. These are the topics for therapy or self-awareness and processing.

Present situation, past charge

Often we are reminded of past charges when something happens in present daily life that is somehow connected. This does not have to be logically understandable. All that matters is your awareness of the past memories coming up and relating to the present situation. This is your invitation for release and allowing.

I feel so bad

The other end of the scale from avoiding the emotional experience is prolonging it. If you enjoy ‘feeling bad’ or have some secondary gain attached to drama, then you’re living the other extreme. It’s not better than avoidance; it’s just another strategy to get what it is that seems more desirable. In the case of a drama queen it might well be what others avoid.

What to do in the present moment?

Coming back to my present situation of the emotional components of my mother’s 70th birthday – what shall I do? I don’t like the anger as it alienates people, I’m short tempered and impatient with my daughter and husband. These are behavioural projections of the anger, whereas I’m reminding myself to stay with it, without needing to express it beyond informing my husband: ‘I’m angry today and if I might project please don’t take it personally.’ His response, knowing of the effect of the date: ‘It is totally understandable that you’re angry’.

There again, I’m reminding myself that acceptance of what is, is paramount. Not just from others, but from myself first and foremost.

Yesterday I had the singular displeasure of sitting through a particularly bad presentation, so bad that I had to write this article as a form of catharsis (see: Aristotle). Without further ado, here are my Top 3 Presenting Don’ts:

Reading off a slide or other presentation materials – This might be my biggest pet peeve: When someone just stands there and reads directly off of what they are presenting. PowerPoint presentations are where you see this the most, as the offender in question will just sit there and read their slides word for word. What good does this do me? I could easily read the presentation on my own time and get the same thing out of it. The same goes true for just reading paragraphs from your notes. Even if you are giving a speech, you should be using notes. Bottom line: Don’t use your materials as a crutch, use them as a tool.

Um…yeah…Um – Another problem I have is when the presenter is not a good public speaker. This may sound harsh, but it really grates on my nerves when every other word out of the presenter’s mouth is “Um”. The biggest problem with this is that the flow of the presentation is interrupted every time one of these words slips out. If the flow of the presentation is constantly disturbed, the audience is going to get less out of the presentation. Another problem (at least in my eyes) is that these words make the presenter sound less professional and sure of themselves. It’s much easier to get your point across if you are seen as an expert rather than the intern.

Looking at your feet – Last but not least, I hate it when a presenter constantly looks anywhere else besides their audience. This is awful practice and serves to keep the audience distant from the presentation as opposed to deep into the content. Eye contact really draws people in and makes them pay attention. If you don’t maintain eye contact, you’ve probably lost half your audience right off the bat.

These are three of the biggest problems I see at many of the presentations I attend. I’d be interested in finding out what others think of the problems I’ve stated above, and any other problems you’ve experienced.